Six weeks, huh?\nPlenty of time to squander,\nenough time to get homesick for the status quo.\nI’ll return triumphantly to routine,\nfanfare quietening\nwith each person I look for\nbut [[never find|constant]].
Three rooms.\nSame place.\nSafe [[place|repeat]].
The only thing that stays constant is the building,\nwith sturdy underground foundations,\n[[I wish|foundations]] I had some.
I don’t know why they say ‘swallow your tears’\nbecause swallowing doesn’t [[help|building]].
I never thought I’d have to thank the [[north star]]\nor the [[ground beneath my feet]]\nbecause they would always be there.\n\nI’d say I’ve never been so wrong,\nbut these three years have made sure\nthat isn’t the case.
<<if visited("see")>>the earth moves\n<<else>>the earth moving\n<<endif>>\s\nand one day it will be high enough on the Richter scale/move enough\nto force the [[sun]] back up from its grave,
I’ve been wearing the same [[blazer|speech day]] since Year 7.\nI think it’s one of the only things that have [[stayed the same|change]].
It’s [[Thursday]] already;\nthree years pass so [[quickly]].
but I can’t\nand it’s so dark\nand all I know [[is|the earth moves]]
I’m evaluating whether \nthe [[water that I won’t let escape from my eyes|people]]\nand the full-fire [[sunlight|summer]]\ncan peacefully coexist.
Thank you for guiding me,\nbut I guess I have to learn to use a compass from [[now on|My feet were never that sensitive,]].\n
But what ruler could quantify\nthe miles I've covered on the backs of [[others|you]]?
it will bring light,\nlight that shines over [[us|final verse]]
“[[Why|goodbye]] go to Speech Day? Especially if you’re not getting a prize.”\n“I don’t know. Free food?”
but not quite.\nIt’s too far away,\neverything is nowadays,\nas time nags at distances\nand undoes [[seams|staples]]\n
[[Was it yesterday|1]] \nwhen I, eleven,\nscared by the hope in me\nsat in a classroom,\nwatching you talk,\nyour voice unknotting\nmy hand’s tight grip\non my tie?\n
[[Was it yesterday|2]] \nwhen I underlined the L.O.\nas you swooped around the classroom\nmaking sure that everyone had?\n
Was it yesterday\nwhen you said hello to me in the corridors,\nor was it some other day\nor everyday\nor\n[[or|4]]
[[Was it yesterday|3]]\nwhen you took us to the Garden Debate,\nencouraging us despite our losses\nand inspiring me to continue debating\nfor another day?
What sort of time is this \nthat I can’t spend more of it with [[you|repeat]]?
[[What sort of time is this|5]],\nslipping away when I’m not paying attention?
end of an era
But what ruler could quantify\nthe miles I've covered on your [[back|quickly]]?
amidst people leaving.\n people leaving me.\n\nAnd I am leaving all the time,\n[[cells dying|7 years]] and new ones being born,\nversions of myself vanishing\nand better ones [[growing]] into place.
They say that it takes merely seven years\nfor your body to [[replace itself|BSKL]].
My feet were never that sensitive,\nbut I can [[feel|the earth moves]]
It’s Thursday already;\nthree years pass so quickly\n\nin the way that \nhours spill from hands\nand [[sunsets|sunset]] just happen.
and I will see you again.
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It's getting [[dark]].\nI think I'm [[losing my way]].
Thank you for supporting me,\nwhile my spine [[grows|My feet were never that sensitive,]].
I could also collect my sweat\ninto a measuring cylinder.\n\nI could also replay the times I've spoken up,\ndecibel meter in hand.\n\nI could also measure the force I've run at doors\nwith a newton [[meter|what ruler]].\n
I would be happy to see blue skies ahead.\nI would be happy to see looming storms.\nI would be happy to [[see]].\n
If all the current students and teachers left,\nwould this still be [[BSKL|constant]]?
It’s an impractical desire.\nI’ve conceded that I’m more Jenga tower than skyscraper,\nwood block after wood block sliding away.\nI stand \non two feet\nin a [[building]] that hosts the shadows of those who used to laugh in its corridors
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<<if visited('foundations')>>I talk to it.\n<<else>>Fearing what will happen if I talk to people,\nI talk to the building instead.<<endif>>\n“Until September, I guess."\n\nthis campus is the kind that easily becomes a ghost:\nwhite walls, cool air, [[empty classrooms|classroom]]
up the stairs, right, left\nup the stairs, left, right\n[[up]] the stairs.
but the staples that hold the chains together are [[secure|three rooms]].
up, look\ncolourful chains run across the ceiling,\nsagging in the centre,\nyou can [[almost|not quite]] touch
In full daylight,\nI see the [[sun setting|It's getting dark]].
“Speech Day is for saying [[goodbye|happy sad]]."
In three years, \nI've grown ten centimetres.\n\nI mean,\nthat's the [[wrong way]] to measure it.\n
Elena